I am a product of aggressive parenting behavior. I grew up back in a time when corporal punishment or spanking was still widely accepted forms of discipline. There were no time-out chairs to sit on. My parents used wooden spoons, the belt, the paddle, and the good old-fashioned hand.
After you read “Is Aggressive Behavior Caused By Paddling” post, please ask yourself which of the three feelings: Empathy, Sympathy, or Apathy did it pull at most?
- Empathy: the feeling that you understand and share another person’s experiences and emotions: the ability to share someone else’s feelings.
- Sympathy: the feeling that you care about and are sorry about someone else’s trouble, grief, misfortune.
- Apathy: the feeling of not having much emotion or interest : an apathetic state.
Spanking as a Form of Discipline?
Would you spank (corporal/physical punishment) a child for being tired? I guess that would depend if you believe in spanking as a form of discipline?
I think my father read this book by Dr. James Dobson who wrote in The Strong-Willed Child (1978): “Corporal punishment in the hands of a loving parent is a teaching tool by which harmful behavior is inhibited.”
As for Joan and I, because of how I grew up, going the route of corporal/physical punishment for our kids was out of the question! That doesn’t mean we are push overs. It just means there are many, other fun ways to, um, I mean more “productive” ways to discipline/train/teach…lovingly guide. Apathy is not one of them… As parents, Joan and I, we might care too much.
Empathy While Shopping
I’m always empathetic to a parent or child caregiver when I see them with a fussy child ESPECIALLY when shopping. As a father of four, I know the difficulties that come with shopping with four over-tired children. Jeez, I remember being in stores check-out lines with 2 babies, one in each arm, both overtired and crying, while trying to control my other two who were so exhausted, but couldn’t sit still …ALL I WANT TO DO IS GET OUT OF THE STORE!
Ugg, those were very tough days…but there were normally at the end of very fun and memorable “Daddy Adventure Days.” Days I would take the kids out all day so, Mom could have some free time.
Many mothers and veteran parents looked at me, a new dad, with empathy and smiles of approval. I got a lot of “veteran parents” telling me what a “good father” I am… Really, Mom deserved a lot of the credit too. Still, I did not mind the comments (based on assumptions).
The Little Boy in the Shopping Cart
The child, the little boy in the shopping cart, could not have been more than three years old. It was obvious, to any parent that, this little guy was exhausted! The whole time I was shopping I could hear this little guy cry, “up!, up!, up!” or hear the echoing crying of “NO!, no!” This child in the store was stuck in the shopping cart for a while…And it went on for a long time. Off and on I could hear this little guy crying to get out. At one point in the store when we passed each other in the aisle…The mother or caregiver was so apologetic about the little guy crying and carrying on. I told her not to worry about it. I understand, and that it doesn’t bother me. He looked like he was about to fall asleep. (I thought, maybe, she was just walking him around to wear him out.) I can understand that.
I have seen a lot of things while shopping, but what I was about to witness would shock even me. A mother or caregiver administer an aggressive public…
Mental Health Humor
Ping Pong Paddle: I can’t take this anymore, is this game ping-pong or table tennis??? ARRRrrr
Ping Pong Ball: I DON’T KNOW!
Caption: Is Aggressive Behavior Caused By Paddling?
Reference
Empathy Definition © 2015. Merriam-Webster, Incorporated. Retrieved on June 10, 2016, from http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/empathy
Sympathy Definition © 2015. Merriam-Webster, Incorporated. Retrieved on June 10, 2016, from http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/sympathy
Apathy Definition © 2015. Merriam-Webster, Incorporated. Retrieved on June 10, 2016, from http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/apathy